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Showing posts from October, 2019

Real Friends Wear Maroon

I have some great friends.  I really do.  These past few years have been filled with more tears and more pain than I knew possible, but my friends have come out of the woodworks to surround me and care for me and that has been indescribable.  There are about twelve girlfriends who have been my rocks and I can't even imagine doing the good, the bad or the ugly without them. This past weekend, three of those friends did it again!  Last Spring we planned a trip to A&M with our boys and we've been looking forward to it for about six months.  The weekend was fun and time with our kids was great.  I loved them getting to spend some time with all of my kids and I loved that they got to hang out with my big kids.  We went to Midnight Yell and Step Off and the football game and we went bowling (16 of us) and played arcade games.  We stayed up talking past midnight and it was dreamy.  Overall, it was a fantastic weekend. But what stuck out to me the most is that real friend

The FJ and Me

A friend of mine and her husband are down to one car for the week.  They have two young kids and going from two cars to one car can be stressful.  I, on the other hand, have an "extra" car in my driveway--it is our "kids' car" and currently I don't have a 16 year old in the house, so it is extra for a few more months.  So, today, while my friend was out to lunch after church, I dropped our "extra" car (the FJ) off at her house with the keys on the dash (assuming that she'll know by the A&M and Kivu stickers that the car is ours and is only a temporary loan). I had to laugh as I was driving the FJ to her house because it was the perfect word picture of me right now.  (Backstory. . . . ) We moved to Franklin just over eight months ago and it has felt like I have been on a bad vacation.  It didn't feel like home and it felt like at any moment, we would actually go back home to Colorado and be a complete family (party of 7 and all) again

Little g gods and My Identity in Christ

This post is going to be a lot like prom dress shopping. . . I'm in the process of learning and growing and really studying and thinking through this topic of gods and identity and I'm not ready to pick "the dress" yet, but writing helps me think and helps me make sense of the chaos in my mind.  So welcome to my emotional dressing room. . . . I've been wrestling with identity lately--I feel like this new chapter in my life has demanded that I do.  And the other night I was at a parents social for all of the 9th grade parents at Dax's new school and I left (early) really wondering about my identity.  I even had to call my brother, Brady (the pastor), to help me wrestle through it. I know that my identity is supposed to be in Christ.  That isn't my question at all.  I am made in His image and I am the daughter of the King.  Those are facts I don't dispute.  (Do I have self image issues?  Yes!  Do I question my own self-worth?  Sometimes.  Those also

Should've Said No. . . ?

Andy proposed during a curtain call of Me and My Girl , a musical in which he played an old man who went most of his life without telling the woman he loved that he loved her... Twenty-three years ago today Andy asked me to marry him. . . .  he was my best friend and I thought he was the love of my life.  Should I have said no? I don't know how many times I have now been asked a version of that question in the past couple of years and I cannot count the number of times I have asked myself that question over the past decade, but it is a dumb question with no great answer. If I would have said no 23 years ago, I would have saved myself from so many tears and so much pain, but I would have missed so much laughter and so many exciting firsts and I would be such a different person. . . . Because of this day, 23 years ago, I am who I am and I have so much to be thankful for. Because of this day, 23 years ago, I have five of the best kids on the planet.  They are t